Jessica wasn’t hungry; in fact she felt like she had the flu. It wasn’t like her to call in sick but she was so exhausted she just couldn’t get out of bed and slept through the phone ringing. She slept through the doorbell ringing and when she finally did wake up, she could not get to the toilet fast enough.

She didn’t really throw up, just bile and dry heaves. Now she was hungry; so hungry she ate a box of crackers with peanut butter, and she put chocolate syrup into some boxed milk she had in the fridge (in case of emergency).  She drank the whole box, and then threw it all up. She felt better, better than she had felt in days. She took a shower, washed her hair, called into work to see if there were any shifts she could pick up, wrote everything into her calendar and fell back to sleep.           

Again oversleeping; Jessica was beginning to think she needed a shift change, but how would that affect her and Joseph? She called in saying she was not feeling well and would be an hour late. Once again she grabbed something from the fridge heated up some water, had some instant coffee and got an intense wave of nausea. She started thinking she must be sick, and ran to the bathroom just making it to the bowl.  

Jessica was no rocket scientist, but she is a nurse. She was not the brightest in her graduating class, yes, but even she could figure out her sickness had about eight and a half months before it would go away. She felt a sense of elation and burst into tears. What was she going to do? She needed her job and Joseph was working as a bike messenger, not exactly the right financial climate for a baby.

She had to get to work: she would think about it later, she couldn’t risk losing her benefits now!

***

On the other side of town, Joe was flirting with a waitress at a coffee shop he was going to on a fairly regular basis now. This pretty young thing was ripe and ready he was thinking as he stirred his cup, yup, so was he.

***

When Joe didn’t show, Jessica finally took the bus. At this point she was in tears; well she was emotional because of the pregnancy anyhow, but where the hell was he?

She got into her apartment and slammed the door behind her, “Fuck him,” she thought.   I’ll raise this kid alone; she cried herself to sleep on the couch.

Joe had gone straight home after his tryst with the waitress. After feeding the old man and feeling tired, he fell asleep. It was just before midnight when he woke up.

“Shit, I forgot Jessica, man she is pissed I bet”.

 Oh well tomorrow he would drive her to work bat his long lashes and be forgiven.  He slept soundly.

***

Belle was really tired.  Hanging out with Grace was taking its toll on her.

Getting her husband’s things to the church, packing Grace for her move to the studio apartment, all this was done out of a sense of family. Grace had become Belle’s family and the situation was mutual.

“Girl, you need to get back to your job, let the building manager help me with the balance, you look tired”

“I am tired,” she said with guilt.  It was only when she had done the lion’s share of the work; she felt a little more ok about leaving for the night.

Grace gave her the leftover chicken and biscuits from the supermarket ‘fast food section’ and sent her home.

“You eat something and go to bed, and don’t worry about coming here tomorrow, you have to catch up on your own job.”

“Thanks Grace, you sure you gonna be alright? You know you can call me any hour”

“I know that, and I love you like you are my own”.

“I’ll see you tomorrow”.

They hugged and Belle left for home, where she would eat, check her messages – which hopefully there would be none – and go to sleep.

***

Jessica was probably about five weeks along now.  She knew if she was going to have an abortion she needed to make that decision. She was lost in thought when her doorbell rang making her startle and trip on the throw rug rushing away from the room she was dressing in. “Shit. Yeah, just a minute;

coming.” By the time she got to the door she had managed to pull the shirt over her, now too small, bra.

“Joseph, what a surprise.”      

“Jessica, I am so sorry about last night I fell asleep, fed Gramps and fell back to sleep. I didn’t wake up until midnight, honey I am so sorry.”

“I figured it was something like that”. She was lying, she figured he was out doing exactly what he was doing, but in desperation chose to ignore her own instincts.

“Let me drive you to work to make up for being such a jerk.” Was she getting fat? Her ass was looking bigger then he remembered.

“Oh, that’s OK, I have some things I want to think about: the bus ride will be just the right amount of time.”

“Ah come on Jess, let me drive you, you look tired.”

Man, she really did look wiped out was she sick?

“Whatever you need to think about you can talk over with me; you know we’re good at that.”

“Joe, this is really personal.”

“Honey, are you sick or something?”

“Or something would be the thing I am Joe; and you would be the father.”

It took him a few seconds to figure that out. “Oh fuck Jessica, how far along are you?

That statement made her realize that she was on her own.

“Never mind Joe, I need time to think, this is my problem to deal with.”

“Hell it is, girl. It took both of us to make you pregnant and we both need to figure out how to raise it, or whatever.”